Daylight Saving Woes

Just a few random tidbits as I get ready to turn in for the night :-)

Daylight Saving Time ending-- whose bright idea was THAT!? While enjoying an extra hour is nice, it's not worth it for six months of darkness. I mean, seriously-- for the next several months, before you even leave work at 5pm, it's already going to be dark out. That's pretty depressing-- to leave work and have it feel like it's already nighttime. Oh sure-- it's now light out at 5am instead of 6am, but I guarantee you that far more people are awake to enjoy daylight at 5pm than at 5am. So what gives? The days are already shorter as is with the advent of wintertime, so why not leave well enough alone? Add to it the fact that not all states switch between Standard and DST, and you've got some nice confusion going there :-P

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I tried my hand at trimming my hair tonight. Wasn't a whole lot, just about a half inch to get rid of most of the split ends. I'm not sure I notice a major visible difference in my hair, but at least it still looks pretty even so far. We'll see what happens when I wash my hair tomorrow-- usually after my hair dries is when the difference between the damaged hair and healthy hair is most noticeable. This was the first time I ever trimmed any of my hair besides my bangs. It was a bit of an adventure, trying to make sure I got it all evenly, but I think the whole endeavor was enough of a success that I feel confident about doing so again regularly.

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Speaking of trimming hair-- Allan is growing out a goatee. When we first met well over 7 years ago, he was already sporting one. He shaved it not long before we got married, and hasn't had facial hair (besides 3-or-4-day-old stubble) since then. We thought it would be fun to experiment and see what he looks like with one again, especially now that he has a lot more gray hair on both his head and in his beard ;-)

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Why is it so hard to find a nice pair of plain white knee socks? I went to K-mart and Ross today, and came up empty-handed. All K-Mart had were the sheer stocking-type of knee-highs, and all Ross had were knee socks in different colors/patterns, mostly argyle. While they were cute, I'm really set on finding a white pair for my Halloween costume next year. I picked out a costume for myself and for Todd for next year. Gotta love the deep markdowns on holiday merchandise immediately following the holiday. I just hope that Todd doesn't change his mind between now and then :-P

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All week I've been working with Todd on a poster for his book report on Monday. We got to break out his box of 64 crayons. Is it me or is there nothing quite so delightful as a nice big box of Crayolas? Who can resist the urge to take them out and start coloring? (I did wind up making a picture of my own-- watch for an upcoming Project 365 entry showcasing it) And am I the only one who likes to take out every variation of a particular color and test them out against each other before settling on the perfect shade for a particular coloring need? I tell ya-- I had a field day when it came to helping Todd select browns for the picture of the horses and wagon :-D

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Well, since DST doesn't warrant a clock fall-back for another couple hours, it'll be too late for me to take advantage of the "extra hour" and have more time to post this before Saturday officially ends, so I'd better wrap it up now. Good night!

"Love Your Neighbor"-- that's all to it

A few weeks ago, our pastor did a sermon on love: the way you love God is to love people. 1 John 4:20-21 best sums it up:

If anyone says "I love God", yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother. (NIV)


It's a pretty straightforward verse, isn't it? And it basically sums up the core of what I believe about Christianity, the core of everything Jesus taught. Moses came down the mountain with 10 commandments, but Jesus reduced it to the most important: Love God (and in doing so, love your neighbor). Everything else follows from there. Seems simple, doesn't it? How on earth this basic message got twisted into the kind of fundamentalist rhetoric we associate modern-day "Christians" with today is baffling.

Allan and I had lunch with our friend Matt today, and wound up having a really interesting conversation on this concept: who are we, as mere, fallible humans, to decide what is and what is not sinful? Even the word "sin" itself carries such negative connotations that we really *shouldn't* be any position to tell anyone whether or not they are sinning. Instead of focusing on that, why not take a different approach when deciding whether an action is right or not? Simply examine it under a lens of love.

Matt gives a great example (which I'm paraphrasing and expanding on):

Is drinking alcohol a sin? By itself? No. But if I'm with a friend who is an alcoholic and susceptible to falling off the wagon if I drink around him, then my taking a drink now becomes an act of selfishness that winds up hurting my friend. That is not love. Or if I drink to excess, damaging my health, I am hurting myself. That is not love. Or if I drink irresponsibly and get behind the wheel, I wind up hurting an innocent pedestrian. That is not love.

This same lens can be applied to just about everything in life, including the current debates (and theme of my last couple of blog posts) about homosexuality.

I believe that any question that is asked (usually in a context of decrying it) of homosexual relationships can also be asked of heterosexual relationships. Just substitute the first few letters, and the issues are identical. If it is harmful and destructive in one, it is harmful and destructive in the other, and so is not love. The gender of the partner you're in a relationship with is irrelevant.

- If I bounced from one unhealthy, meaningless relationship to another, I'm hurting myself (and potentially the other person), regardless of whether it's a man or woman.
- If I had multiple sex partners to fill some sort of empty void in my life, it's destructive behavior whether I'm sleeping with a man or a woman.
- If I cheat on my husband, it's devastating to him regardless of whether my lover was male or female.
- And if I'm in a loving and committed relationship with someone who is my partner in all life endeavors, through thick and thin, in sickness and in health-- that sort of relationship IS healthy and IS about love. Whether it's heterosexual or homosexual.

I'd like to conclude with something Pastor Paul Raushenbush wrote at the end of his book, "Teen Spirit: One World, Many Paths", in answer to a person questioning which religion is "right":

"I stick with my core belief that God is love and that anything that is of love is of God. That's a good test for (people) of different faiths: Does their religion promote love? Hinduism (for example), believes in a supreme God and calls upon all people to revere and love all forms of life. For me, this passes the test."

To me, that's all there really is to it. Does it promote love? Or does it harm someone, whether it's yourself or others, physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually? That is the question.  Everything else just naturally stems from the answer to that question. Love God, love your neighbor. Can't have one without the other.

Passive Discrimination

The title of this post is what started a brief conversation on Facebook between me and an old high school friend, regarding this news article he shared. This post also a bit of a follow-on to yesterday's post, in that it deals with people's attitudes toward those different from them or what they believe to be the norm. In yesteryear it was racism (though it still is an issue today, sadly), today it is discrimination against LGBT people.

There was someone once (I can't remember who) who said something along the lines of how he would rather deal with an overt racist (such as members of the KKK), yelling racial slurs at him, than a covert one. Because with the overt one, he was at least being honest about his feelings, you knew where he stood, and could deal with it accordingly. But what do you make of the covert racists, the people who display a smiling, polite veneer, only to stab you in the back later?

It's an interesting point. There are many people who don't consider themselves racist, or don't consider themselves discriminatory against homosexuals. Yet their actions (or lack thereof) say otherwise. When you turn a blind eye to obvious injustices, when you sit by and do/say nothing in the face of abuses, you are condoning that abuse. You are just as culpable as the bigot dishing it out.

And the worst part of it? As Mark points out: these teenagers (who are naturally vulnerable to begin with) are already receiving hateful messages from the overt abusers. Now bring in the people whom these kids normally look upon with respect-- parents, teachers, pastors, politicians, other influential adults. For these supposedly sane, moderate, polite adults (after all, they don't go yelling epithets or making threats) to sit silently by and do nothing, or worse yet, shrug it off, sends an even more painful message: that the targeted kids don't matter, ARE second-class citizens, and will never be accepted.  That they agree with the bigots' message. And that *they* (the tormented teens) are the ones with the problem.

It's heartbreaking to think that the impact of such an attitude can do much more harm than the verbal sticks and stones hurled by bullies. That people in positions of authority, even though they don't outright verbalize any bigotry, convey that message even more powerfully when they condone it. Do they realize that just because they don't actively, outright SAY or DO anything discriminatory, it doesn't necessarily mean they aren't still BEING discriminatory?

That's passive discrimination. And it's far more insidious, in my opinion, than active discrimination. The people committing the latter can pretty much be dismissed for the lunatics they are, but the former? Such people wield influence and outnumber the latter. And that's scary.

So... think of your kids. Or the kids of someone close to you. Or any other loved one. Or even yourself. Think about what kinds of effects you can have by either acting indifferently to their problems (and thereby siding with the bullies)... or by providing love and support.

If only more people chose love and support...

Won't Somebody Please Think of the Children!?

A friend on Facebook posted a link to this blog, which has apparently been making the internet rounds. Before reading on, have a gander:

http://nerdyapplebottom.com/2010/11/02/my-son-is-gay/

Back yet? Or did you skip the link? If you did-- oh go on, click it!

Too lazy or link-phobic? Fine, here's the synopsis: when the author-- whose 5-year-old son dressed as Daphne from Scooby Doo-- dropped her son off at their Christian preschool, she was met with horrified looks and backward attitudes from some of the so-called Christian mothers. This blog post was her defiant response against ignorant and bigoted attitudes toward people who don't fit the "norm", whatever that may be, and I enjoyed reading it.

I could really relate to the things she was saying. I bristle when my own mother expresses concern about Todd's choice of playthings-- that boys should be playing with trucks or Legos or other "boy-like" things, not cuddling with stuffed animals the way I did (and still do :-D). Todd does indeed favor the stereotypical "masculine" toys, but even if he didn't-- what's the big deal? If my son enjoys building things, I'll buy him toys that exercise that interest. And if he grew up to be the type of boy who wanted to wear makeup, I would teach him how to put it on properly, same as I would a daughter that age. Why all these gender-specific hangups?

When Proposition 8 was on the ballot here in California, I remember having more than one heated discussion (to put it mildly) with my mother about it. I was shocked to learn that my normally rational, critical mom had bought into much of the anti-gay rhetoric fueling support for the passing of Prop 8. Her highlighted point?

Think of Todd.

Ahem.

To which I respond: I AM!

I don't want him to grow up in a world where he could be treated as a second-class citizen because of his sexual orientation. As the recent teen suicides evidence, this world can still be a harsh and ugly place for someone who doesn't fit the majority "norm". And I want to do everything I can to try to make that world a *better* place for my son, not be a part of enacting laws that make it *worse*.

I think most sane, rational people would agree on the patent ridiculousness of the idea that a 5-year-old boy choosing to dress up as a female character for Halloween indicates that he's abnormal or will "become" gay. I think it would be a ridiculous notion even if that boy were 15 or 25 instead of 5. So I applaud that mother for having a sane and healthy attitude toward her son. If only more parents and influential adults treated children with that sort of love, respect, and thoughtfulness, the world would have a whole lot more healthy, happy, well-adjusted kids.

And isn't that a *good* thing to have?

The Crazy Cost of Housing

This past weekend we drove up to Buellton (about 30-40 minutes north) to visit some of our friends from church, who had all moved there around the same time last year. It was a great opportunity to see friends we hadn't seen in a long time, catch up, and get a tour of their houses.

Ah yes-- their lovely, lovely homes.

It's no secret that Santa Barbara is a pretty expensive place to live. We're probably only outdone by a few cities such as San Francisco and New York City. In a way it's understandable-- we live in a pretty nice part of the country, nicer than even SF and NYC. You're never more than a stone's throw away from the beach, and a few miles inland are the mountains. The weather is pretty steady year-round: never too hot, never too cold. Even its public schools are pretty good compared to other districts.

The downside to it is the fact that it IS a relatively small city. For someone who grew up in metropolitan LA, a population of 90K is small. There is no Wal-Mart. No Target. No JC Penney. No big-chain dollar stores. No discount supermarkets. For that we have to travel 40 miles north to Lompoc or 40 miles south to Ventura.

Still, it's a beautiful place to live, and it's easy to see why so many people come up here with the sole intention of studying at UCSB... only to wind up staying here longer (as evidenced by the numerous UCSB license plate frames around).

Makes you wonder, though, how anyone can afford it. Which brings me back to my friends in Buellton. Let's do a little comparison.

Here, $450,000 will get you one of the following:
1) An 1800sf, 3BR/2BA manufactured home in a mobile home park. No garage, just a carport.
2) A 1200sf, 2BR/2BA condo sandwiched between other condos, both on the sides and above or below you. No garage, just covered assigned parking. No different from apartment living, really.
3) An 1100sf, 2BR/1BA duplex home in a PUD. 1-car attached garage and driveway space.
4) A standalone 900sf 1BR/1BA cottage in need of a *lot* of TLC. If there is a garage, it only holds one car and is detached.

But in Buellton? More along the lines of a 2000+ sf single-family home in excellent condition, with a 3-car attached garage.

Crazy, isn't it, how much more your dollar will get you in 2 different cities just 30 miles apart? Crazier still, that Santa Barbara is NOT the most expensive place to live in the US. I don't even want to imagine home prices in the more expensive cities.

So I can definitely see why our friends uprooted. And their 30-40 minute drive into work every day at least entails a wonderfully scenic route with the oceans stretching as far as the eye can see on one side, and the mountains rising majestically on the other side.

Still, I've had my fill of long commutes. UCLA is not that far away from my parents' home, but with legendary rush hour traffic along the 405, they often turned into hour-long, grueling commutes while I attended there. When I worked at Amgen, I drove at least 45 minutes each way from their house to Thousand Oaks. Thank goodness that at least there was no traffic during the times I worked (10am to 7pm). Let's face it-- I've gotten rather spoiled these days in Santa Barbara, where our "commute" to work is a 7-minute... WALK. Even when we move to the new office building, the driving commute will be under 10 minutes.

Someday we hope to pursue the American dream of home ownership. Exorbitant home prices in Santa Barbara aren't helping that endeavor, but we're saving and keeping an eye on the market. Someday...

Anniversary Dinner-- guess where?

Well, Day 1 of NaBoPloMo should be easy to break in, for every Nov 1 brings something easy to write about: our anniversary!

Todd, Allan and I went to our favorite restaurant in the whole wide world-- Brummi's! Tonight's visit marked the 9th or 10th time we've been there throughout the course of nearly a year. Why is it our favorite? Well, read all about the divine food here: http://heckledtrio.wordpress.com/2010/01/04/little-slice-of-germany/ And read about Brummi's wonderful, quirky, friendly owner Veronika here: http://probablytabitha.com/2010/01/08/veronika/

Twice a year Veronika makes her special "Schweineshaxen" -- pork shank, I believe is the English term. But what do I know about cuts of meat. We first got a taste of it on Valentine's Day this year, when we joined our friends Leah, John Paul, Jeff and Laura for a Valentine's dinner special. Reservations must be made at least 2 days in advance, to allow Veronika to begin the marinating process. The end result is a little slice of heaven: crispy skin and soft, tender meat that slips right off the bones.

Every October, for the entire month (in honor of Oktoberfest), Veronika again features her Schweineshaxen special. Since our anniversary fell on the day after October ended, we asked if we could still make reservations with a couple orders of the special. Turns out she still had some, so we could! :-)

And if I thought all the food was delicious before, well... it was, but tonight's dinner was something else!

The pork, as usual, was delightfully crispy on the outside and tender on the inside. But best of all were the crisp bits of fat near the edge of the bone-- I popped a piece into my mouth, and oh my. I finally learned firsthand what it means for a crisp bit of fat to "melt in your mouth". It was divine. Allan got a side of spaetzle and I got a side of potato dumplings. It was all very delicious, but then! Then the pretzels arrived.

Now, I've never been a really huge fan of pretzels. I mean, they're okay, and I'll eat them for snacks now and again, but they're not amongst the "OMG, must have!" list. Usually they are too salty and/or too dry. When Veronika brought out a bag of fresh pretzels, I grabbed Allan's and took a bite, fully expecting to put it down again without a second thought.

Wrong.

Another slice of mouth heaven! The pretzel was not only perfectly salted, it was soooo soft and moist! I don't think I've ever eaten fresh BREAD that was that moist and delicious and flavorful. We later found out that the baker who made those pretzels was the husband of one of Allan's former professors/grad colleagues! Small world!

Of course, no meal at Brummi's is complete without dessert. I got my usual Apfelkuechlein with homemade vanilla sauce, and we also got an order of one of Veronika's latest creations-- crepes. As if the authentic German food wasn't delicious enough, she gives the French a run for their money! See, most crepes are too sweet for me. I don't know if it's because they put too much Nutella filling in it, or if the "dough" itself was already too sweet to begin with, but usually after eating about 2/3 of your average crepe, I've had enough. Veronika's crepes, on the other hand? I couldn't get enough. Just the right amount of sweetness. One was filled with Nutella, and the other filled with plum jam. Topped with ice cream, whipped cream and a splash of chocolate sauce, and my taste buds were yet again in heaven.

At the end of the evening we got our picture taken with Veronika for her wall, filled with photos of her and her regular customers. Yay for being immortalized amongst the other folks who have come to love Veronika and her restaurant filled with love.

What a wonderful evening. Most couples prefer to spend their anniversaries alone, but not us. For us, the celebration isn't complete without the little man. It's a true family celebration! And now we can all waddle off to bed, tummies full and taste buds satisfied :-)

NaBloPoMo (and a call for suggestions)

It's been nearly a year since I started blogging on Wordpress. I started out strong-- it was the end of November, which meant it was during last year's NaBloPoMo (what is that, you wonder? More about it  in a sec). Which meant it was right around the time I started reading Tabitha's blog, where her daily postings inspired me to try to follow suit. Especially since I was actually *paying* to use Wordpress! As you can tell, I haven't always been successful, and by the time 2010 rolled around, I had dwindled to an average of one post a week, which dropped down to one per month in recent, well, months.

So... what IS NaBloPoMo, you ask? Well, perhaps more of you are familiar with NaNoWriMo, the National Novel Writing Month which takes place every November. A few years ago, a spinoff on it, National Blog Posting Month, was born. Its premise is simple: blog every day for the entire month of November. Yep. 30 days of nonstop blogging. I learned about it too late last year (November was already well under way), but now that it's looming again, I thought I would give it a try. Maybe blogging every day will get me back into the groove of posting more often. Maybe not everyday, but certainly more than once a week!

I've been jotting down ideas for posts that have been swirling around in my head for a while, so I'll have something to write about on days when inspiration simply won't hit.

But what I'd really like is to hear feedback from you (yeah, right-- hardly anyone comments anymore, but hey-- a girl can hope, right?).

What would you like me to write about?

There are 30 days in November, I've got about a week's worth of posts already pre-mapped out in outline form, and I'd really love to solicit suggestions from you. So bring 'em! No matter how serious, how risque, how deep, how shallow, how ridiculous or how silly you think it is. You know better than anyone how much I can ramble off on tangents, no matter what the subject ;-) So-- comment here, post on Facebook, send me an email, send me an IM, talk to me in person!

Here's to November!

Still alive!

It's been over a month since I've posted anything on here, and I feel like I've got lots to say (most of the time, I'll read or hear something somewhere, like a sermon in church, or a random Twitter post, that will inspire a train of thought I want to jot down). But by the time I actually find some time to sit down and write anything, the mood is gone, and my mind is once again a blank slate.

So I thought I'd warm up with another boring, bland "catch up on my life" post.

Obviously, the last exciting thing to happen was the Tech Retreat, which I wrote about in my previous blog post. Since then...

Todd returned to SB the last week of September, throwing us back into our routine of things. So far he's enjoying second grade. Since he's back with us, I instituted a rule at home: no electronic devices on (computers, iPad) until after Todd goes to bed. Which is 9:00 pm. It's amazing how much time you can reclaim in the day without any computers on. It leaves us the full evening to spend our time with Todd, working on homework and other things. And you know what happened? After a few days of this, I discovered I'd weaned myself off the computer fairly well. Once I did turn it on, I didn't find much to hold my interest. I read a few blogs, caught up on email and Facebook, and that was it. No interest in watching any of my myriad of streaming Netflix shows or playing games. I was more interested in leaving the desk to do other things-- like actually make it to bed early, or read a book, or play the piano.

Yup, you read that right. We bought an electric piano keyboard-- a Casio Privia PX-130, with matching stand and piano bench. The weighted keys are almost as realistic as real piano keys and the sound is very clean and crisp. The fact that you can plug in headphones makes it perfect for our apartment living situation. Todd had started learning piano over the summer,  so we decided it would be good to continue it now that he's back in SB. As for me, it's been 13 years since I even *touched* a piano, so I've been having fun getting myself reacquainted with it, practicing finger exercises and relearning songs I'd long since forgotten. Amazingly, my fingers still seemed to retain a memory of some of the songs I'd learned and played so often so long ago, so relearning the notes went faster than I thought. And now that I'm an adult and actually playing because I *want* to, it's actually a fun and relaxing way to spend the evening.

In mid-October I managed to get several friends together for a trip to Old Town Tavern for some karaoke. Wednesday nights are the perfect night for it, as it's virtually empty from 7:30pm till about 10:00pm, allowing each of us to get several songs in. This time I managed to get in 9 songs, including a couple of duets with Nick and a round of "Barbie Girl" with AJ. Apparently my friends and I have been there often enough for the DJ to recognize us, for after Nick and I did our first duet together and were leaving the stage, the DJ told me to get back up there, whereupon he put on Abba's "Waterloo". Evidently I've sung that song more than a couple of times during previous karaoke trips, and he remembered! :-)

Last Friday we held a fundraiser dinner for Todd's school-- it was a 50s/60s themed rock 'n' roll party. Allan and I invited several of our friends from church, most of whom have babies just under a year old. We hired nannies from a local nanny service to come to our house and watch the 3 babies plus Todd.
I dressed up in typical sock hop garb, made mostly of clothes I already owned. I did buy a skirt at K-Mart-- $2 for a perfect-length polka dot skirt that I can still reuse for other events. And Craft Essentials was the perfect place to find some really cute ribbons for my hair. Now I have a Halloween costume all set for next week :-) Two of our friends, Matt and Erin, dressed in matching 60s hippie garb, and actually won a prize for best dressed couple! Yay!

The fundraiser dinner was a blast. There was a silent auction, raffle, no-host bar and root beer float station for additional fundraising, and the highlight of the evening was the band-- Captain Cardiac and the Coronaries, an oldies tribute band. The dance floor was packed! What an evening :-) I hope the fundraising was equally successful to the amount of fun everyone had, especially some of the older guests, for whom this scene was pure nostalgia.

For now, though... back to the daily routine of work, school, and household chores. No complaints, though-- there is beauty in a set routine :-)

Kicked out, college-style

Okay, this post probably would've had more oomph if I'd posted it last week, right when we were in the thick of things... but I had a rare weekend all to myself and decided I'd rather spend it vegging out on the couch, reading and watching TV.

But... a brief update on what occupied half of our week last week:

The annual Tech Retreat! Every year in mid-September the Tech Group goes out for some team-building and some fun and relaxation. 2 years ago we descended upon a beachfront hotel in Pismo Beach, doing Amazing-Race-style challenges as teams, eating delicious food and of course, drinking. Last year was a little more low-key with a camping excursion to El Capitan, and a geocaching exercise which was pretty lame and not very team-like.

This year, we headed south to Carpinteria State Beach, invading a large portion of the campground.

Wednesday started out ordinarily enough, with the team-building exercise of a chili cookoff! It was actually kind of fun-- designing a marketing campaign and cooking delicious chili. Our team actually made it to 3rd place, not bad considering how we didn't hit on any marketing  inspiration until we had about 20 minutes to go, and then scrambled to put it all together. I'm sure the delicious chili helped :-) That evening after dinner, Allan and I broke out our copy of the Game of "Things", and proceeded to introduce several of our co-workers to the game. As always happens with this game, lots of raucous laughter ensued. Elsewhere on the campsite, other folks were involved with other games of their own. That's when the trouble started.

You see, unlike last year at El Capitan, we didn't have a section of campground exclusively for ourselves. In other words, we had "civilian" neighbors. People who didn't appreciate our noise. But the truth was, it wasn't all that bad. Sure, there were a few tables full of loud laughter and talking, but it wasn't anything out of hand. And! It wasn't. Even. 10pm! When the complaints started.

A little after 10pm, Allan and I packed up our game and headed out. Since we don't believe in tent camping, we booked a motel a half mile down the road to spend the night in. We had plans to be back at the campground by around 9am to get breakfast.

Thursday morning, we roll out of our clean, comfy beds, and Allan checks his phone for email. And he starts laughing. There was an email from the VP of Engineering, announcing that 1) we'd run into some problem with the authorities and 2) we were being ejected from the campsite.  Since Thursday activities were still on, however, we were instructed to reconvene further down the beach. All morning long I couldn't stop giggling everytime I thought of that email. We arrived at the beach and patiently awaited everyone else, eagerly anticipating all sorts of stories of crazy hijinks the night before. After all, I'd heard some stories about how out of hand some of the engineers could get at previous retreats!

To our disappointment, we learned that our co-workers hadn't gotten much crazier than we already were after dinner, playing our games and just hanging out. And that most people actually retired by midnight-1am, a relatively reasonable hour considering that... well, if you're out camping, where are you gonna go the next day? To work!?

Turns out it was mainly a case of picky neighbors and a picky campsite who just wasn't used to even a subdued version of our tech group. Apparently at some point there were six cop cars congregated in the campground, leaving our admin, who arranges these things, scrambling to smooth things over. At 8:30 the next morning, we were officially kicked out by the campground personnel, and everyone scrambled to get their stuff together and make the "Exodus of Shame" out of there by 10am. I still laugh when I think about it.

Still, Thursday's activities went off without a hitch-- football, frisbee, bocce ball in the sand, as well as kayaking and paddleboarding lessons, and serenading by guitar/ukulele players. Oh, and another round of "Things", of course ;-) Lunch was served at the beach, and dinner was fan-damn-tastic, and was a really great way to close out the retreat.

This was definitely one of the more entertaining retreats. 2 years ago, the team-building exercise was just too exhausting, and last year it was kinda lame. But this year was great-- a fun exercise, lots of fun and relaxing beach activities, and being kicked out just like a bunch of drunken college frat boys. Something tells me we won't be going back there again next year! ;-)

"Things", Jeopardy-style

Allan and I finally caved in and bought our own copy of The Game of Things the last time we were at Target. We'd had too much fun with it the last couple of times we played. You can read more about the (mis)adventures on Tabitha's blog: first, with her friends, and then again several months later with our friends.

Her blog explains how the game works, but the gist of it is that everyone takes turns reading off a card with sentences like "Things you can't stop", everyone writes their answers, and then takes turns guessing who wrote what.

Well, after we bought our own copy of the game, Allan and I spent an evening riffling through the cards and laughing at some of the questions (okay, they're not really questions, they're more like... topics). It didn't take long for a pattern to emerge when we jokingly responded with one of our classic answers, and realized that it was rather fitting for the next several questions, as well. We collected our favorites, culled that pile a few times, and have narrowed it down to a select few, which I thought I'd post on my blog and put up for a vote :-)

Now, because we're actually fitting questions to answers (rather than the other way around, as specified in the game), this really has a Jeopardy-like flavor to it. And before I present the "answer", allow me to refresh your memory with this post. If you've read it, you'll immediately know what the pending answer is. And if you haven't, message me for the password and go catch up!

Back yet?

Okay, then, here we go. Tonight's answer is:

"Have you ever taken it up the ass?"
(or variations thereof, such as: "Asking 'Have you ever taken it up the ass?'" or "Being asked 'Have you ever...'")

And here are the possible accompanying topics (with some of my own commentary where I felt like it):

1. Things you would have said to Eve had she tricked you into eating the apple (hey, you're already "sinning", may as well go all the way, right?)

2. Things you would like as your last words (now THAT would be a hell of an epitaph!)

3. Things you shouldn't shout at the top of your lungs

4. Things you shouldn't say to break the silence in a conversation (especially at the top of your lungs)

5. Things you shouldn't write on a Valentine's card

6. Things you shouldn't teach your parrot to say (because we all know they'll squawk it at the top of THEIR lungs!)

7. Things you shouldn't say to your husband (Allan made me include this one. I wonder why...)

8. Things you shouldn't title a children's book (hey... what if it's about advanced sex ed??)

9. Things a chimp thinks about when he sees you at the zoo

10. Things that make you jump

11. Things you shouldn't do when having dinner with the Queen

12. Things a lady shouldn't do (Allan made me include this one, too. Don't know why-- he always maintains I'm not a lady...)




So? Which one is your favorite answer? Leave a comment and let me know! :-)

Viva Las Vegas in the Hot Summer Sun

Our much-anticipated weekend getaway to Vegas finally happened-- and what a blast! I booked the vacation way back in May, and we all wondered how we would survive the months till then. Well, somehow those months flew by and you know what? I'm glad we went towards the end of August-- one last hurrah before the end of summer.

This weekend trip incurred a lot of "firsts" for me:

• first time going to Vegas with friends (instead of family, like my previous half-dozen trips there)


• first time going out barhopping on the Strip at night


• first time splashing in a hotel pool


• first time wearing a 2-piece swimsuit in public since I was a kid


• first time wearing short skirts/dresses that I can no longer wear because they're only appropriate in Vegas anymore


• first time taking any sort of "dancing" class-- and it was a pole-dancing class, of all things!


• first time dancing in the middle of a group, and not off to the side where nobody can see me

We started off early Friday morning to pick up our rental van and load it up. The drive there was smooth and traffic-free, and we arrived with plenty of time to check in (we all stayed at Harrah's, right smack-dab in the middle of the strip) unpack and rest before heading out for dinner and drinks. We used the first of our Vegas Insider Card deals: 2-for-1 entrees at Bill's Gamblin' Hall and Saloon (formerly the Barbary Coast). It was the last time all 6 of us (Allan & me, Joe & Tabitha, Amir & Priyanka) would be together the entire trip until the very last day. We then headed off to the Imperial Palace for some karaoke! I wanted to make sure I got to sing in case I lost my voice again, like last time. Tabitha and I opted to do Gretchen Wilson's "Redneck Woman" together, paying $10 to have it recorded on DVD. Alas, it was not to be-- about 4 songs before our turn, a pair of girls got on stage and sang the exact same song!! We felt so robbed! Unfortunately, they were good, too, so we didn't exactly want to follow with the same song so soon afterward. Maybe if they'd done a poor job, we might've still stuck with it. So we scrambled to find an alternate, and wound up doing Carrie Underwood's "Before He Cheats" instead. A bit harder, and some of the notes got too low for me, but we'll see what the actual DVD looks like when I get a chance to watch it, and maybe post it :-)

Saturday morning Allan and I started our day with breakfast at the Harrah's buffet. All of us received 24-hour buffet passes with our room reservation-- allowing us to visit any buffet at 7 of the Harrah's properties as much as we wanted within a 24-hour period. I then headed off to Planet Hollywood (formerly the Aladdin) to meet up with Tabitha for our "Stripper 101" class, where we learned lap-dancing and pole-dancing techniques. The class was a lot of fun, and the pole-dancing portion was actually harder than it seemed-- a lot of balance, coordination and concentration required. We left the class wishing we could find a bar with a pole in it, to practice our newly-learned moves ;-) After lunch, Tab and I made our way to the pool at Flamingo while our husbands rested in the rooms. It was crowded in the water-- no surprise, as daytime temps soared to 105-110 each day, with "lows" dipping into the 80s. But in the shade the water was cold and refreshing and kept us cool for our half-block trek back to our hotel.

Dinner at the Caesar's buffet was delicious, and worth the half-hour wait in line to get in. Afterward, the "night out" began: Allan, Amir, Priyanka and I started out trying to find spots at the Venetian, but all of them were two noisy and crowded for our taste. We exited the hotel in time to catch the "Sirens of TI" show across the street. The scantily-clad pirate wench dancers were too far away to see, but we got a nice view of the fireworks show at the end. We tried to cross the street to get to Treasure Island itself but wound up having to go further north, past the Wynn/Encore complex, in order to do so. By the time we made it to TI, we were pretty tired from all the walking, and flopped down at the first quiet spot we saw-- the Isla Tequila Bar, which was actually pretty nice and comfy! We finished off the night with a trip to Caesars Palace, again bypassing the noisier bars/clubs and opting for the comfortable Seahorse Lounge, which offered not only a nice view of the aquarium with interesting sea animals, but made for great people-watching. It was 3am by the time we decided to call it a night. I can't remember the last time I stayed out that late!!

Sunday was another relaxing day. I tried to take Allan to the Flamingo pool but we were turned away. Guys really get gypped in Vegas-- girls get in free for everything, whereas guys have to pay. In the evening we got all 6 of us together again and drove to downtown Vegas, where we had dinner at the Firefly in the Plaza Hotel. It was a tapas bar, and the food and drinks were awesome! Since we didn't have reservations, we didn't get to sit in the main dining area (not without waiting, anyway) overlooking Fremont St, but we ended up with something better-- comfy sofas in the lounge area of the restaurant, which made dinner even more relaxing and enjoyable. If ever there was a must-eat place in Vegas, it's the Firefly. We caught the light show and then went into the Golden Nugget, where we found a nice cozy booth of sofas inside their Rush Lounge-- just in time for the live entertainment. It started off pleasantly and mellowly (is that a word?) enough-- Tabitha took a nap on Joe's shoulder and Amir recharged himself on the casino floor. By the time he got to the lounge, Tab was awake, and with all of us refreshed, we finished off the night with some group dancing in the middle of the lounge. What a way to end our last outing in Vegas with a bang! :-)

We got home late Monday evening, exhausted but happy. What a trip! I had originally intended to return to work Tuesday, but a few weeks ago, Amir wisely cautioned against it. So I took Tuesday off, and am I glad I did! I needed the extra day to recharge and rest and recuperate. Even today I'm not 100% there in terms of being at work, but it would've been much worse yesterday.

One last thing: early on in the trip, I decided to order the same drink wherever we went, so I could compare how the different bars did it. I started it off with a purchase at the Stripper Bar, where we got free drinks included in our Stripper 101 class: Vodka cranberry. It was delicious-- sweet, not too tangy, and barely a taste of alcohol (a testament to its smoothness). I ordered more at the Isla Tequila Bar, the Seahorse Lounge, the Firefly Tapas Bar and the Rush Lounge. They were all pretty good, but by far my favorite was the one from the Stripper Bar. Close second was the one from Firefly, and only because it was a tiny bit tangier and had the slightest hint of alcohol detectable. And no matter what, ALL of the vodka cranberries I got at the various Vegas bars were much better than anything I've ever gotten at a local bar here in Santa Barbara! :-)

Ah, Vegas. There's always something to see and do there, no matter how many times you've been there. And with friends, it's double the fun! :-) Here's to the next trip, hopefully while our coupon book and Vegas Insider Card are still valid!

Entitlement Run Amok

I regularly read two of LiveJournal's communities dedicated to rants about the truly nutty, entitled customers that can be found these days: customers_suck and customerssuck. The names of the communities say it all. The selfishness, rudeness, bitchiness and entitlement complexes of the customers featured in those stories never fails to astound me. I count my blessings that I am not in a customer-facing job, myself. I already have enough trouble dealing with people as is, let alone if I had to do so in a professional capacity like that. Today, however, I got to enjoy witnessing a "customer suck" firsthand.

It is Tuesday. For me, that means swim class at the gym in the evening. There are only 4 lanes in the pool, and the class can take up at least 3 of them-- the 3 largest ones, leaving the small one at the far end, by the wall, open for other swimmers. Tonight there were 8 of us in the class, so we needed all 3 reserved lanes. Unfortunately, there was an older woman in one of the middle lanes (whom I'll call "Gwen" because her platinum blonde hair and bright red swim cap remind me of Gwen Stefani's hair and lipstick), and our instructor tried to get her to move to the far lane. She would've still had the lane all to herself, as there were no other swimmers around besides those of us in the class.

Gwen refused. She said she didn't want to swim in that lane because she would hit the wall (understandable, as she was doing a lot of backstroke, and I've lost count of how many times my own arm has scraped the wall or smacked the lane dividers as I drifted to and fro). Okay, fine, stay in the middle lane-- the instructor offered to let her stay in that lane, but because the far lane was too small for 2 people to share, Gwen would have to share her lane with one of the class swimmers.

Generous of him, don't you think? After all, from 6:30-7:30 the first three lanes of the pool are *supposed* to be reserved for the swim class, and he's still letting her stay in her preferred lane.

Of course, if it *were* good enough, I wouldn't be blogging this, would I? No. This was not good enough for Gwen. She became more agitated as the instructor repeated not only the rules (3 lanes reserved for swim class till 7:30), but her options of either moving to the far lane and getting it to herself, or sharing her middle lane with one of the students. Before long, she threw her hands up in the air and stalked across the lanes to the steps, grumbling, "Fine! You can have your lanes. I pay $80 a month so that *I* can swim. Thank you very much!" and off she went, still muttering, into the jacuzzi.

About 15 minutes into the class, I noticed that another woman had come into the jacuzzi. Gwen didn't waste any time talking her ear off and complaining about the situation. Apparently she embellished her side of the story, for the woman felt compelled to speak to the instructor on Gwen's behalf. I think she figured Gwen and the instructor didn't understand each other, since English was clearly not Gwen's first language. Once the instructor explained to the woman what was going on, she seemed satisfied. I'm not sure if she tried to explain it to Gwen, as I resumed my swimming exercises, but I do know that a little while later, a younger guy joined the two women in the jacuzzi. Surprise, surprise-- Gwen started to complain to him, as well. Around this time, I exited the pool for a quick bathroom break, and when I returned, I could hear the young man totally yanking Gwen's chain, asking her things that clearly provoked her further. 10 minutes before the class was over, Gwen gave up and left the jacuzzi and pool area altogether.

The young man and the second woman turned to the instructor to talk about Gwen. The young man was noticeably disgusted by Gwen's behavior and attitude, and fully admitted that he had purposefully egged her on. The woman tried to give Gwen the benefit of the doubt, thinking that maybe Gwen just misunderstood. No, everyone was quick to point out. Gwen understood fully, because she insisted she didn't want to swim in the far lane "because I'll hit the wall!" The instructor, to his credit, remained fully professional through it all-- when dealing with Gwen (twice-- he even stopped to talk to her when she was in the jacuzzi, in an attempt to placate her) and when dealing with the young man who wasn't shy about expressing his opinion of Gwen: "she's absolutely nuts!!"

No excuses or rationalizations about it-- Gwen was, in customers_suck lingo, the epitome of an "EB"-- an entitlement bitch. I am quite certain she complained to staff about not being able to swim after paying good money for her membership. Hey, newflash, lady: we ALL pay good money to use this gym AND partake of the classes it offers, without interference from you. I mean come on, the swim class takes place ONE day a week, for ONE hour. Surely you can adjust your schedule to swim around that time. And if not-- hey it's not like they kicked you out of the pool altogether! You were allowed to stay and even offered options! If that's not being accommodating, I don't know what is. I just hope that's the last I ever have to see of Gwen. Sadly, considering how often I'm at the gym and its pool, that's probably not likely, unless she actually cancels her membership because of this incident. To which I say: good riddance!

Time flies when... you have time?

It's hard to believe July is more than halfway over, and that in just another month, Todd will return from his summer with my parents, throwing us back into our everyday routine of work, school, after-school activities, and home. You know-- the stuff that kept us so busy that the weeks would fly by in the blink of an eye.

Ironically, these past several weeks have flown by faster than that. The truly strange thing is that during the week, the days seem to crawl by. It wasn't until summer started that Thursdays would roll around, and I'd mistakenly think it was already Friday. And yet the weeks themselves, as a whole, have gone by in the blink of an eye. There are so many things I wanted to catch up on doing-- mostly reading-- and it feels like I've barely lifted a finger and half the summer's already gone.

I think part of it is because of the activities I've undertaken now that I couldn't before:

-- I joined the gym, and have been going there several times a week. Most of the time, it's after work, and by the time I get done with the class, or the post-swim shower, it's late evening. Dark, even, at times.

-- I started a technical writing class that, on the whole, doesn't occupy a whole lot of time, but is still something that needs to be done now and then.

-- We started a Netflix subscription, and between the mailed DVDs of "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman" and the instant online streaming of "Bones" (not to mention the regular USA shows piling up in my Hulu queue), well... you can see why I invested in that laptop desk ;-)

-- Myspace renewed my annual karaoke subscription-- keeping the super awesome sale rate I was able to snag last year. What a pleasant surprise! So I figured I should make use of this continued subscription, especially since singing into my computer mic is hard to do when you're not alone!

-- I've been going out with friends a lot. Like a night of karaoke and a concert in the park. Stuff I wouldn't ordinarily be able to do because we've got a kid at home.

The one thing that we've been especially bad about lately is cooking. You'd figure that without a little kid dictating the eating timeline, we'd have more freedom and more time to cook and eat healthfully. But I think we've cooked as many times this past 7 weeks as we ordinarily do in 1 week during the school year. What gives!? Why is it that my first time back at the stove is today, when hubby's out of town and I'm cooking only for myself?

I really think that being out of the routine that Todd normally imposes on us has thrown us off. Sure, there's all the extra activities we're undertaking while we revel in our freedom, but there really is something to be said for knowing exactly what you're going to be doing at what time of the day, every day. Guess it just goes to show that we're really creatures of habit, eh :-P And while I'm still looking forward to enjoying as much of the summer as I can, a small part of me looks forward to the end of it, when order and routine will once again be restored in our household :-) And when that happens, the days AND weeks will both fly by... not just the weeks without the days... because that creates some really odd sensations!

Nights of Music

Wednesday night I finally did something I hadn't done in nearly a year-- hit the Old Town Tavern for karaoke with good friends. The last time I went, it was on a Friday night, and didn't get too crowded till about 9pm, so I hoped that the middle-of-the-week Wednesday would mean even fewer crowds. And I wasn't disappointed!

Tabitha blogged about some of the interesting characters we ran into at the bar, so I'll spare some of those details: http://probablytabitha.com/2010/07/15/karaoke-its-spreading-faster-than-the-pregnancy-bug/

Basically, we arrived at 7:30 on the dot, which is when karaoke actually started. The bar was practically empty, so for a while, the rotations went between me, Tabitha, another lady named Cathy, and the DJ himself. As you can imagine, we managed to get a lot of songs in. And since there wasn't really much of an audience besides us (me, Allan, Joe, Tabitha and Timo), it was a great opportunity to try out some songs I'd normally be a little hesitant about doing in front of a larger crowd.

Nick joined us at 8pm, and managed to get some really awesome songs in, himself. People say that I'm "brave" or whatever, for going up on stage to sing, but let me tell you: Nick is the brave one, not me. See, I won't dare do a song I'm not 100% familiar and comfortable with, unless I'm doing it as part of a group. Nick, on the other hand? Went up at one song knowing only half of it, and winged his way through the rest, making up his own lyrics and tune... and it was awesome! If you weren't reading the lyrics on the screen, you would never know that he was singing different words. When we did "Baby It's Cold Outside" as a duet, Nick actually "crammed" for it by listening to it on his iPhone about 5 minutes before we got on stage! And he still did well! That kind of improvisation is something I just can't do, and hence why I think people who are willing and able to improvise like that are far braver than I am. Kudos to you, Nick!

All in all, the lack of crowds for a long time enabled me to get a LOT of songs in. Here are the solos I did that night:

• "Blame It On Your Heart" -- Patty Loveless
• "I Do, I Do, I Do, I Do" -- ABBA
• "Waterloo" -- ABBA
• "Everybody's Somebody's Fool" -- Connie Francis
• "I Feel Fine" -- The Beatles

And here are the songs I did as a duet/part of a group:

• "Redneck Woman" -- Gretchen Wilson (with Tabitha and Colleen)
• "YMCA" -- Village People (with Nick and Tabitha)
• "I Love Rock and Roll" -- Joan Jett (with Tabitha)
• "Baby It's Cold Outside" -- Martina McBride & Dean Martin (with the ever-improvising Nick)
• "Sweet Home Alabama" -- Lynyrd Skynyrd (with Nick, who mused that it must be quite a sight to have two Asians doing Southern rock!)

That's 10 songs total within the span of about 3.5 hours! That doesn't happen very often ;-)

Joe and Tab left at around 10pm, and about 15 minutes after that, the place started to fill up with college kids-- Wednesday night is college night, apparently. Not only did those young kids make me feel OLD, but they really epitomized what I used to be/do at their age-- loud, drunk, and boisterous. And they could not sing worth a dime. Joe keeps claiming that he didn't do that well when he sang his couple of songs, but those teenagers college kids made him look like Frank Sinatra. Despite that, the DJ actually turned the volume UP. We got out of there not long afterward, but hey-- considering it was nearly 3 hours before the college crowd arrived, I'd say we got a pretty darn good night of karaoke and songs in. My voice was shot by the end of it!

Here's a video montage Tabitha put together. Enjoy!



Last night several of us (me, Allan, Joe, Tabitha, Timo and our friend Amanda from UCSB) went down to Chase Palm Park to enjoy a picnic by the beach and free Concert in the Park, featuring and oldies tribute band called Captain Cardiac and the Coronaries. They weren't bad, but they need a new sound technician :-P We had fun relaxing on blankets, sharing our picnic fare, listening to the music (when we could hear the singing over the instruments, that is!), enjoying the warm sun and ocean breeze, watching the people, and playing with the hula hoops!

Amanda brought several hula hoops, which she couldn't use at first because it was relatively crowded. I'm sure nobody appreciates being bopped in the head by a twirling hula hoop ;-) But after the break halfway through the concert, people started packing up and leaving, opening up some space around us. By the end of the concert, Amanda and her hula hoop tricks had attracted quite a crowd, and before we knew it, all kinds of people-- adults and children alike, were having fun playing with the hoops. What a great way to end the evening.

So... two nights in a row of nights filled with fun, good company, and music. And there's still the weekend (and the French Festival, yay!) to look forward to :-)

Shopping and Sexism

I made a trip to Bed Bath and Beyond today and picked up a bed desk for my laptop. It has a built-in USB-powered cooling fan, a little lamp, soft padding on the sides for a mouse, and a cupholder. Since lately I've been spending a lot of my computer time on my laptop from the comfort of Todd's bed, I found a need for a sturdy stand that would keep my laptop cool and protect my legs from its heat. Pillows may protect my legs but aren't good for the laptop. Especially mine, which is 6 years old and prone to really heating up! This is what I wound up getting:



I'm using it as I type up this post now, and I love it! It's just the right size for my large, 15.4" widescreen laptop, which seems to love the cooling fans. They provide some really nice airflow, and keep the laptop happy. Which makes me happy :-) And with a 20% off coupon, it's really worth the price!

So my little purchase covers the "Shopping" part of the post title. What about the "Sexism" part, you may be wondering?

Well, I took my co-worker Timo shopping with me, as there were some things he wanted to get at Bed Bath and Beyond as well. But before that, I wanted to visit a couple of open houses before they closed up. When we got to one of them, we were greeted by the slick, stereotypical-salesman type of agent. The type you know you'd have a hard time saying "no" to if you wandered into his showroom. We introduced ourselves individually, and the guy immediately focused his gaze and attention on Timo. When the agent asked a question, I would respond, and he would glance at me for a split second before turning back to Timo "full time". Apparently I also asked a question during this introductory discourse, which the guy answered, all the while looking at... well, not me! Just when I was starting to feel a bit disconcerted about this, Timo explicitly directed the agent's attention back to me, and we moved on to the tour.

Afterward, we both mused about how there are still people out there who just automatically assume that when they see a man and a woman together, the man is the one making the decisions. I haven't encountered very many forms of sexism in my life (surprising, considering I served in the still-predominantly male Army), so it was a bit surreal to actually witness a form of it in action.

I've also had similar experiences when accompanying my parents to business transactions. When we were shopping around for a burial plot for my grandmother, some of the funeral home personnel would turn their full attention to me, even though it was my mother asking them questions/answering their questions/making the decisions. They just assumed they'd get faster answers out of me because my mom's English isn't as fluent, but come on! It's not like she can't speak it at all! And if there's something that needs clarification, I'm there to help, but I'm not the primary person to be addressed.

All in all, it made for an amusing part of the day, but it still makes you wonder: whatever happened to the common courtesy of addressing the person who is talking to you, regardless of what you think his/her role is?