LJ Writer’s Block question: What’s the worst thing that could happen to you today? Bonus question: How would that thing potentially benefit you?
In answering this question, I actually want to hearken back several months, to my previous job. It was a pretty good job-- because of the nature of our work, there was little pressure to meet what few strict deadlines existed. Not to mention that our client base was a few hundred fellow employees, not paying consumers from the outside world. The fact that it was a large company meant the benefits were excellent-- health care was cheap, time off was generous, and retirement benefits were truly unbeatable.
Most of you were probably aware of the news of impending layoffs at the time, so it wasn’t a complete surprise when I turned out to be one of the few thousand affected. I guess the answer to the question above would be: losing my job. And it happened. Still, it wasn’t without its benefits, and that’s where the bonus question comes in.
I enjoyed 3 months "off" before I began working again. During that time, I got to stay home and spend lots of time with Todd, enabling me to bond with my little boy, something I could never do before (leaving the house at 9am, returning at 8pm-- shortly before his bedtime). I enjoyed taking him to and from school, helping him with his homework at home, and generally doing all sorts of mommy-child activities together. My mother fell ill in December and being home full time enabled me to not only look after Todd while she was at various appointments (and then the surgery itself), but look after the household and take care of my mom.
Then there is the job itself. Though the benefits aren’t quite so stellar (but what can you expect when the company is a fraction of the size of my old one?), they are decent. More importantly, I’m really enjoying it here. I’ve learned a lot and continue to do so every day. The atmosphere is decidedly different-- more laid-back, less stuffy. There’s a difference between "casual" and "business casual", after all. While at first Allan and I were a bit skeptical of how working together would affect our relationship (would we be sick of each other?) it has turned out to work well for us. We have a nice, harmonious routine and incredible flexibility in changing our schedules so one of us is always available to look after Todd while he’s with us in SB till summer. Plus, quite frankly, it’s nice to have tech help I can guiltlessly prod for help whenever I need it, just a flight of stairs away :-)
And I know I’ve mentioned this before, but not having to commute at least 45 minutes one way each day, is FANTASTIC! There is something to be said for seeing daylight when you go home in the evening-- even during the short days of the winter months!
I know I’ve addressed the blog question of the day retrospectively. But it does indeed exemplify the "silver lining in every cloud" adage. I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. I believe that nothing is an accident or coincidence. And I believe that it’s always possible to look back upon unhappy and disappointing events and see the good things that have come out of it. You may think that’s the eternal optimist in me speaking, but I challenge you to look back on your own less-than-golden memories and find a silver lining. Or two. Really adds perspective, doesn’t it?
La Maison des Tortues: One third of the "heckled trio" writes...
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Sunday, March 9, 2008
They've gone and done it
I've been trying to sell Allan for years. In fact, I've offered people MONEY to take him off my hands. Strangely, I never seem to have any takers. So what makes the menagerie think they will have any better luck trying to offload Allan's offspring on some unsuspecting buyer?
For Sale Ad (if you haven't already seen it)
Speaking of buying things, last weekend we finally went ahead and purchased a memory foam mattress. We got a full-sized one for the futon. That means we won't be able to put the futon into its upright position, but we haven't anyway-- while Todd lives with us, I sleep out on the futon while Daddy and little man share the queen bed in the bedroom. We got a pretty good deal on one-- $475, made cheaper because it's not the TempurPedic brand (I rarely do brands, anyway) and because the place spends little overhead on the frills and upkeep of an actual indoor store-- everything is inside a couple warehouses. But the salesmen were very friendly, very knowledgeable, and very easygoing-- no pressure tactics, just the information the customer needs. If you live here and ever need a new mattress, I'd highly recommend them: Mattress Mike in Goleta :)
Okay, that little plug over-- the mattress has been pretty good so far. I think it's still in the break-in period, a little firmer than it should be, so my back is still occasionally sore sometimes upon awakening, but it's nowhere near as bad as it used to be. It's a good test drive-- if it works out well, we'll buy a bigger one when we have our own house someday.
On another note: a physiological oddity: the knuckle of my left hand's ring finger has taken to having occasional "hot flashes" out of nowhere. Without warning, I'll suddenly get this flood of heat on the knuckle, almost like I'm exposing that little area to a flame or something. It lasts several seconds and then goes away. It's the darndest thing-- and the oddest sensation. Anyone ever experienced something like this before? What IS it, exactly?
Wow, almost dinnertime, and it's STILL light out. Yeah... I'm enjoying the longer days :-D Summer will be upon us before we know it!
(originally posted at: http://www.myspace.com/hellykwee/blog/365423228)
For Sale Ad (if you haven't already seen it)
Speaking of buying things, last weekend we finally went ahead and purchased a memory foam mattress. We got a full-sized one for the futon. That means we won't be able to put the futon into its upright position, but we haven't anyway-- while Todd lives with us, I sleep out on the futon while Daddy and little man share the queen bed in the bedroom. We got a pretty good deal on one-- $475, made cheaper because it's not the TempurPedic brand (I rarely do brands, anyway) and because the place spends little overhead on the frills and upkeep of an actual indoor store-- everything is inside a couple warehouses. But the salesmen were very friendly, very knowledgeable, and very easygoing-- no pressure tactics, just the information the customer needs. If you live here and ever need a new mattress, I'd highly recommend them: Mattress Mike in Goleta :)
Okay, that little plug over-- the mattress has been pretty good so far. I think it's still in the break-in period, a little firmer than it should be, so my back is still occasionally sore sometimes upon awakening, but it's nowhere near as bad as it used to be. It's a good test drive-- if it works out well, we'll buy a bigger one when we have our own house someday.
On another note: a physiological oddity: the knuckle of my left hand's ring finger has taken to having occasional "hot flashes" out of nowhere. Without warning, I'll suddenly get this flood of heat on the knuckle, almost like I'm exposing that little area to a flame or something. It lasts several seconds and then goes away. It's the darndest thing-- and the oddest sensation. Anyone ever experienced something like this before? What IS it, exactly?
Wow, almost dinnertime, and it's STILL light out. Yeah... I'm enjoying the longer days :-D Summer will be upon us before we know it!
(originally posted at: http://www.myspace.com/hellykwee/blog/365423228)
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Growing up a loner
(From the LiveJournal "Writer's Block" list)
How do you think having siblings (or not having siblings) affects who you are as a person?
This is an interesting question. As most of you know, I am an only child, and have often wondered what life would've been like had my parents decided to give me a sibling. I remember sitting on the front steps of our apartment one summer when I was 8 years old, asking my mom if I could have one. Amused, she humored me with: "Would you prefer a brother or sister?". I expressed a preference for a sister, only to have Mom demur with "I'm too old". Which was actually true-- she was already 40 and even today it's still a bit risky to have kids at that age-- let alone over 20 years ago. So... no sister. Or brother.
I remember an activity we did in 4th or 5th grade-- the teacher had us all divide into groups based on birth order, and scatter to the corners of the room with our fellow only-children, firstborns, middles, etc... the onlies group had maybe 2 or 3 kids, me included. Then the teacher asked us to go into the group we WANTED to be in. No surprise-- quite a few kids wandered into our group, sick of the bickering and sibling rivalry that you always hear about. Me? I was too shy to actively walk to another group of kids, and at the same time I was also fascinated at hearing some of the "horror stories" from the kids who wished they had no siblings.
Growing up, I sort of assumed the "big sister" role, because the neighborhood was filled with kids who were all younger than me, by a range from 2 to 7 years. But that was only part of the time-- though we all played together often, it's not exactly like I spent all my waking hours with them. Still, if you've ever looked at those personality analyses based on birth order, the first-born and only-child profiles tend to be similar, so who knows how much of an influence spending time with younger kids had on shaping who I am today. Anyway, for the most part, I grew up a bit of a loner.
And to this day, that still holds true. Everywhere I've lived, every place I've gone to school or worked, it has always been the same story: I kept to myself more than anyone else, and thus always felt like a bit of an outcast. I had many acquaintances and colleagues and people I hung out with, and even people I knew well enough to actually call "friends", but the ones I could call *true* friends? Close friends? Few and far between. Granted, part of that is just who I am-- by nature, a shy and reserved person. But it does make you wonder if having a sibling would've mitigated that effect somewhat. Would I have been a little more at ease around other people if I had grown up having to deal with someone near my own age?
These days, I think of my son. He's even more "isolated" than I am. I have several aunts and uncles, and dozens of cousins-- even more than Allan does. Todd has one aunt and uncle, and will never have any cousins. As you can imagine, he can get pretty spoiled, being the only grandchild on both sides of the family, and nobody else (except "cousin" Sammy the Lhasa Apso) to compete with for attention from his extended family. We're 99.9% sure we won't have any more children, so Todd is destined to be an only child, just like Mommy. On rare occasions, however, I waver. I watch Todd playing with other kids (especially the younger ones) and it strikes me how he would make such a good big brother. It is rare that he gets to play with kids his own age, and grownups are never as fun to play with. As one neighborhood mother of three pointed out to me: the kids manage to keep themselves entertained, so there's actually less demand for your attention and time in that regard. Interesting point... but... no. Eh-- I think I turned out okay, and I'm sure Todd will be fine ;-)
Hmm, what was the original question again? I don't know if I've answered it. Probably because it can't really be answered, since you'll never really know how a different household scenario would've affected you. Maybe a lot, maybe not at all. As for me, I do think that being an only child probably reinforced my natural tendencies toward wallflower-like behavior. I think I'll always feel a bit like an outsider, never truly belonging to any social circle, never truly fitting in. Whether that means I wouldn't feel this way if I'd had siblings, or that I wouldn't have "fit in" well with my own family growing up anyway... well, I could ramble on and on, speculating... so I'll stop boring you and end this here :-)
How do you think having siblings (or not having siblings) affects who you are as a person?
This is an interesting question. As most of you know, I am an only child, and have often wondered what life would've been like had my parents decided to give me a sibling. I remember sitting on the front steps of our apartment one summer when I was 8 years old, asking my mom if I could have one. Amused, she humored me with: "Would you prefer a brother or sister?". I expressed a preference for a sister, only to have Mom demur with "I'm too old". Which was actually true-- she was already 40 and even today it's still a bit risky to have kids at that age-- let alone over 20 years ago. So... no sister. Or brother.
I remember an activity we did in 4th or 5th grade-- the teacher had us all divide into groups based on birth order, and scatter to the corners of the room with our fellow only-children, firstborns, middles, etc... the onlies group had maybe 2 or 3 kids, me included. Then the teacher asked us to go into the group we WANTED to be in. No surprise-- quite a few kids wandered into our group, sick of the bickering and sibling rivalry that you always hear about. Me? I was too shy to actively walk to another group of kids, and at the same time I was also fascinated at hearing some of the "horror stories" from the kids who wished they had no siblings.
Growing up, I sort of assumed the "big sister" role, because the neighborhood was filled with kids who were all younger than me, by a range from 2 to 7 years. But that was only part of the time-- though we all played together often, it's not exactly like I spent all my waking hours with them. Still, if you've ever looked at those personality analyses based on birth order, the first-born and only-child profiles tend to be similar, so who knows how much of an influence spending time with younger kids had on shaping who I am today. Anyway, for the most part, I grew up a bit of a loner.
And to this day, that still holds true. Everywhere I've lived, every place I've gone to school or worked, it has always been the same story: I kept to myself more than anyone else, and thus always felt like a bit of an outcast. I had many acquaintances and colleagues and people I hung out with, and even people I knew well enough to actually call "friends", but the ones I could call *true* friends? Close friends? Few and far between. Granted, part of that is just who I am-- by nature, a shy and reserved person. But it does make you wonder if having a sibling would've mitigated that effect somewhat. Would I have been a little more at ease around other people if I had grown up having to deal with someone near my own age?
These days, I think of my son. He's even more "isolated" than I am. I have several aunts and uncles, and dozens of cousins-- even more than Allan does. Todd has one aunt and uncle, and will never have any cousins. As you can imagine, he can get pretty spoiled, being the only grandchild on both sides of the family, and nobody else (except "cousin" Sammy the Lhasa Apso) to compete with for attention from his extended family. We're 99.9% sure we won't have any more children, so Todd is destined to be an only child, just like Mommy. On rare occasions, however, I waver. I watch Todd playing with other kids (especially the younger ones) and it strikes me how he would make such a good big brother. It is rare that he gets to play with kids his own age, and grownups are never as fun to play with. As one neighborhood mother of three pointed out to me: the kids manage to keep themselves entertained, so there's actually less demand for your attention and time in that regard. Interesting point... but... no. Eh-- I think I turned out okay, and I'm sure Todd will be fine ;-)
Hmm, what was the original question again? I don't know if I've answered it. Probably because it can't really be answered, since you'll never really know how a different household scenario would've affected you. Maybe a lot, maybe not at all. As for me, I do think that being an only child probably reinforced my natural tendencies toward wallflower-like behavior. I think I'll always feel a bit like an outsider, never truly belonging to any social circle, never truly fitting in. Whether that means I wouldn't feel this way if I'd had siblings, or that I wouldn't have "fit in" well with my own family growing up anyway... well, I could ramble on and on, speculating... so I'll stop boring you and end this here :-)
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Rise of the animals
An interesting little tidbit before I launch into my pitch. I just noticed that if you do a Google search for "weeples"-- well, guess what the first result to come up is? Oh, go on, try it! :-D
I thought it was really cool, too bad I don't blog there anymore, eh!
As if I didn't spend enough time on this blasted site, check out who one of my newest Myspace friends is. You might recognize a few of the faces from past blog entries I've written, either on here or on Todd's diary. They're new to the Myspace scene, and would love to see their friends list grow and their social network expand. So if you crack even half a smile at their profile, click the "Add" button... can't have too many friends in this world, especially loyal, cuddly, plush ones! :-D
http://www.myspace.com/stuffedmenagerie
(originally posted at: http://www.myspace.com/hellykwee/blog/363071793)
I thought it was really cool, too bad I don't blog there anymore, eh!
As if I didn't spend enough time on this blasted site, check out who one of my newest Myspace friends is. You might recognize a few of the faces from past blog entries I've written, either on here or on Todd's diary. They're new to the Myspace scene, and would love to see their friends list grow and their social network expand. So if you crack even half a smile at their profile, click the "Add" button... can't have too many friends in this world, especially loyal, cuddly, plush ones! :-D
http://www.myspace.com/stuffedmenagerie
(originally posted at: http://www.myspace.com/hellykwee/blog/363071793)
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